try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
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