We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
