Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
you never un-have a 4some
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