So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
