is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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