well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Randomize
