i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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