I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Randomize