Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize