do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
Randomize
