Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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