The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
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