IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
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