everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
the hot woman interviewing me is reading jokes off the back of laffy taffy.... I'm getting laid and possibly a job
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize
