I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize