Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Sorry my hands just texted you
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
