I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
