No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Jumped in the kebab van and said he was Ultimate MasterChef. Incurred wrath of six angry Turks. I got free chips.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
