i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I'm both gender and math confused
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
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