We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
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