she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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