I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
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