Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
