Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
