Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Randomize
