seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
so I definitely just chased tequila shots with a biscuit covered in sausage gravy
Thats fucking manlier than riding a bear into battle
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
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