..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
