i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
