yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
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