i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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