i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
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