So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
You work out of a Hotel?
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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