Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize
