i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
