I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize