My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
No kiss but I got free McDonald's so at least we can focus on what is really important here
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
