I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
So many bounce houses so little time
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I currently don't understand fingers.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
