Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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