I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
