dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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