i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
