in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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