HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I'm sitting in my bathroom sink, eating a tuna sandwich. He had better weed than I expected.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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