Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Randomize
