if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
I got back at him the only way I knew how, by hooking up with the guy he hates from their rival fraternity.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Randomize
