im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize