So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
Randomize
