he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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