He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
I don't think brook has ever known best
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
No one will ever love me with the amount of puke on my hand
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
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