I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize
